Calvinism

Just speaking from the heart here.....

Here's the thing I have don't get about Calvinism. Despite the numerous textual & eisegetical concerns I have, Calvinism just seems (as a systematic) to artificially elevate God's sovereignty and glory at the expense of His many other glorious and wonderful attributes, like His enormous & bottomless reservoir of love and tenderness and kindness and patience and goodness.

Does God have the right and power and authority to be as Calvinists portray Him? Yes, absolutely. But is that portrayal in keeping with His character as expressed all throughout scripture in its totality?....... Not in my opinion.

The God of Calvinism may be biblical in a very narrow sense, but it just doesn't strike me as totally aligned with the whole counsel of His word.

The God I see in scripture is not small, or dictatorial or petty or needing to meticulously control every thought and molecule, (i.e. playing both sides of the chess board so as to ensure His victory.) The God I see in scripture is powerful enough to know and ensure the future outcome of all things, IN SPITE OF the free will activities of His creatures. Now THAT is Powerful and Sovereign.

The God I see in scripture desires to be loved and honored and obeyed freely and genuinely.......not as a result of a divinely preprogrammed & robotic responses.

The meticulous determinism and fatalism of Calvinism just make it all seem.....controlled and fake....staged.....scripted.....artificial. I sometimes feel like the God of Calvinism has more in common with the Allah of Islam than with Jehovah of the Bible. It just leaves no room left for a REAL, true, & intimate father/child relationship.

If the Calvinists have it right, and God really is micro-managing and meticulously determining everything....well, ok............but I just envisioned Him as being so much more.